aaaaaaarrrgggghhh & ggggrrrrrrrrrr

...so.

tonight i go with my sister to seattle to see the bloc party show. i've seen them twice already, but they have a new cd and the show should pretty darn good. if you haven't heard the band, check out their first single "helicopter" or "banquet." good stuff, if you like alternative music. their first cd hearkens back to the frenetic new wave of the early-80's, filled with guitar-driven and break-neck pop.

i went with a friend 2 weeks ago to seattle to see the franz ferdinand concert. another band i had seen twice before. of course, they weren't as good when i saw them 5 years ago, but they were still a lot of fun live. more 80's-style pop, dancey and quirky. their new cd is well below average, but when they cranked out the older tunes it was pretty special.

i was talking to my mom a few weeks ago by phone. i had expressed to her that i don't feel blue, just kind of melancholy. it is because, with all the running around i've had to do and setting up myself with different disability programs, things are pretty well in place now and i have NOTHING TO FRET ABOUT!! i should just be happy that i can relax now. but i've had so many things to keep me occupied for so long; it's weird to be in a position to not have to run off somewhere... i suppose that's what "living" is supposed to be about: not worrying about things & just relaxing.

i fly to chicago on wednesday to take care of a family thing. it's not like i go to chicago to sightsee or anything, and i'm only there for only a few days. but it's just another thing that's kind of THERE. i don't know how to feel about it. but it will be great to see family again.

a high school friend passed away yesterday. he had suffered from cancer for quite a while. when i first moved here in september, i stayed with a neat couple i've known for over 10 years. the guy i know who died is the brother of the father of the family i stayed with. follow me ok? i know the couple i stayed with through my high school friend, if that makes better sense. i hadn't seen this high school friend for quite a while, but we had been in touch.

we've all had people close to us who have died. my dad passed away 12 years ago. but when someone my age dies, i am reminded that i am indeed getting older. certainly i have had my own scares recently, and that shakes me up as to my own mortality. i think what it does to affect me is also because i have never married or had children. i think there is a part of all of us that wishes to seal our longetivity by procreating. we really do not want to leave this world without putting our stamp on it, and that is usually through having children. but that is just in general; everyone is not like that.

i have a brother who is very concerned about having the first male "weber" child. i find this laughable. with having 19 nieces and nephews, i have found it a bit odd that there are no male webers to carry on the family name, but it stopped being a large concern for me a long time ago. none of my brothers who are married have boys, only girls. i only see it now as extremely funny! after all, it's just a name! but again, especially with men, it's a part of "sealing our legacy."

given the good deal of free time i have now, there are a lot of things i could "complain" about... :)

here are a sample of things i could (and really want to) go off about:

bluetooth (Hate them; they look like a big conch shell coming out of your ear and NOBODY talks on the phone THAT much, unless you're a telephone operator...)

people who end sentences with the word "at" (almost everyone in US does it, but after living in europe so long and speaking "proper" english, it still drives me nuts even 2 years later. as in "where are you at?" really bad english! it should be "where are you?" you see, "where" negates the use of "at." so saying the bad sentence would mean "where are you where?") i guess that means i don't like anyone... :D

computer games (waste of time. it's the current disease with a lot of men. COMPLETE waste of time. if you're single, you spend all your free time playing world of warcraft, staying up from 3pm to the early morning hours, and eat only microwaveable foods and potato chips and drink mountain dew. if you're married, you ignore your family to play another person online who is in new york, and even become friends with this phantom. this puts a huge strain on your marriage and your wife and kids become other characters in your game, not really real. oooooooo i DID go off, and i'm not sorry... but i've seen the same patterns with game-players, and that's very disturbing to me. if anyone reading this is a video game-player, i strongly urge you to stop. i won't get on my soapbox about many things, and i have certainly had my own addictions in the past. but playing video games is a worse malady than gambling or internet porn, in my mind and experience. if you do this please stop. if you want to save your marriage or if you're still single and thinking about marriage, stop with the video game-playing. in europe i had a PS2 and would play the occasional game after work. but i used it as a stress-reliever and would only play for about 30 minutes, and not every day. computer games, though, can really suck you in and not release their hold. i know, this all sounds like a joke, but i assure you it's not.)

i believe i go to chicago in august for a few things. there is the lollapalooza music festival. i have been to it the last 2 years. if you like alternative music, it can be really great. 150 bands in 3 days on 8 stages in grant park in downtown chicago right on the banks of lake michigan. this year, the main bands are depeche mode, jane's addiction, beastie boys, snoop dogg, the killers, tool, and the decemberists. they usually have a great mix of older alternative and new bands. in the last 2 years we've been treated to pearl jam, radiohead, muse, rage against the machine, nine inch nails, daft punk, gnarls barkley, kanye west, even the school of rock all-star band. fun festival. they even had a few country artists last year.

the other reason for going to chicago in august is that, well, it's my birthday. the awesomely big 41 :D my brother's birthday is a few weeks after mine, and it would be nice to have a joint party. we also plan on getting a family picture done. we're not all together as a family that often, so we probably need to get that done...

enjoy the coming of summer. it's probably getting warm your way. the weather has been up and down here, mostly down. the weird thing is that i've been wearing a coat since i moved here! it would be nice to shed that....

oh! just by the by, for those of you who want to know, i start studying again in june....

talk to you soon, be nice to each other :D

christian